The Unlikely Sisterhood of Miscarriage

Guest post by author Karin Holmes

When I lost my baby in July 2011 to a miscarriage, I made a new acquaintance. It was an unpleasant one – loneliness that also brought his good friend depression along.Read More »

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Sands Awareness Month

June is Sands Awareness Month when we can all come together and raise awareness of miscarriage, stillbirth and newborn death and the importance of support for those who experience the death of a baby through pregnancy or shortly after.Read More »

Sands Queensland supports Queensland Government “In Loving Memory” Initiative.

Parents who have experienced an early pregnancy loss (before 20 weeks gestation) will be able to honour the memory of their baby with a new commemorative certificate, issued by the registry of Births, Deaths and Marriages in Queensland.

The initiative was successfully campaigned by mum Jodie Tangikara, who was the first to receive one of the new certificates in memory of her son Marcus Tangikara.

Jodie Tangikara receiving her certificate
Jodie Tangikara receiving her certificate

 

In Loving Memory of Marcus
In Loving Memory of Marcus

 

Sands Queensland Committee President, Nicole Ireland attended the presentation of the first certificate to Jodie and Hayden Tangikara, along with Attorney-General and Minister for Justice Jarrod Bleijie and Hervey Bay MP Ted Sorensen on October 29th.

 

Attorney-General and Minister for Justice Jarrod Bleijie with Hayden and Jodie Tangikara, bereaved parents support group Sands Queensland president Nicole Ireland and Hervey Bay MP Ted Sorensen in Scarness for the certificate presentation.
Attorney-General and Minister for Justice Jarrod Bleijie with Hayden and Jodie Tangikara, bereaved parents support group Sands Queensland president Nicole Ireland and Hervey Bay MP Ted Sorensen in Scarness for the certificate presentation.

 

Sands Queensland President Nicole Ireland said,

“We commend the Queensland Government’s willingness to response to parents requesting a certificate to recognise babies who die before 20 weeks gestation. Acknowledging loss and creating memories is a vital step in dealing with the grief which comes from the death of a baby and this certificate will support that process.

Sands Queensland has maintained a long partnership with the Queensland Government, through Queensland Health, and we are pleased to have had the opportunity to work with the team at Births, Deaths and Marriages to ensure these certificates meet the needs of bereaved parents. Our focus at Sands is supporting parents, their families and friends through one of the most difficult times in their lives and we know many parents will chose to receive one of these certificates”

Certificates can be ordered through Birth, Deaths, Marriages Queensland online HERE.

Information from the Queensland Government can be found HERE.

For further information from Sands Queensland, please visit our website HERE.

Grace’s Gathering and the Wave of Polish

Last year saw the first Wave of Polish held during October for International Pregnancy and Infant Loss (IPIL) month. A challenge was issued to paint your nails blue and pink each Tuesday to help raise awareness of pregnancy and infant loss. The event was a success with many showing their support and we hope this year will be bigger and better.

WOP-001

Theresa Carter organised the event and in conjunction with the Wave of Polish campaign she will be holding an auction of one off polishes made by some amazing Australian Indies and also some gorgeous pastels from amazing Australian polish brands. The auction will start on the 8th October at 9am and finish on the 15th October. Visit WAVE OF POLISH BLOGSPOT for all the details.

Last year funds raised were donated to Sands Australia and helped fund ‘Grace’s Gathering’, in memory of Theresa and Rod’s daughter Grace. These meetings gave the wonderful volunteer parent supporters at Sands an opportunity to connect with other supporters, share ideas and support, and receive further training to enable them to better support bereaved parents

 

Sands Queensland Grace's Gathering at Sands House, New Farm.
Sands Queensland Grace’s Gathering at Sands House, New Farm.

 

At the beginning of each gathering a poem written by Theresa was read out. Each and everyone of us were touched by Theresa’s words and we would like to thank her for sharing a part of Grace with us and bringing us all together.

The following is the poem written by Theresa in memory of her daughter Grace.

 

 

You say just get over it.

You weren’t there the day we held our daughter, in our arms the first and the last time.

You say haven’t you grieved enough?

You weren’t there to rub her face as she struggled to cling on to life.

You say you can have another one.

You weren’t there to answer yes, turn life support off on this child, of yours,

Your child part of YOU.

You say time will fix all.

You weren’t there to watch her take her last breath, while your heart shattered into 1000 pieces.

You say its time to move on.

You weren’t there when I was aching, screaming and rocking in pain at night,

just to hold my baby,

just one more touch.

You say she wouldn’t want me to be sad.

You weren’t there the days I ripped at the grass on her grave, just wanting to see her face one more time

You say I have another child, life must be normal for him.

You weren’t there the nights I rocked him to sleep, as he wanted his little sister.

You say you must look after your husband.

You weren’t there the days I wiped tears, from his face just so he could get to work.

You say it all over and over again,

I know you mean well and I forgive you,

because you weren’t there…..

Theresa 28th September 2003